When you are browsing around EQInterface.com, you should be looking at individual pieces and/or full sets that by today's standards would be outdated, because you are on an Emu server running an older client. You need to look for pieces and/or sets that are compatible with Titanium, SoD, or SoF (depending on which one you use).
On the home page there is a link at the left for "Downloads". Click that, and then click on the "Interface Pieces" or the "Complete Sets" links. When you're in those lists (THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT), sort them by "Last Updated".
Look for lines in the comments that say "updated for Titanium", "SoF compatible", etc.
If I were you I would try to find just one piece, like a Player Window or Hotbar Window, find one you like, and then try installing just that one piece. Once you get that to work, I think you'll find your moment of clarity on this matter.
Generally speaking, if a ui window piece isn't compatible, the game will load the default ui. There are some errors the game can handle, though, so if you load one up that works, but you still get the "your xml files are not compatible blah blah blah" when you log in, check to make sure it's not a feature that is vitally important and just play on.
I don't have any screenshots showing my setup on EZ, but here is what my hotbar looks like on any toon any server: